June 25, 2006

Losing a loved one to addiction

Sometimes, despite our best efforts to intervene and help our loved ones out of the trap of addiction, the battle ends with it costing them their lives.

What can you say? Who do you turn to for answers? There is nothing you really can say or do once they are gone because then it's too late, we cannot get them back.

We can't see why it has come to this. We cannot be comforted.

Their death serves as a sobering example to all of us, their loved ones that:

A substance has the potential to gain control over a person to the extent that they hand that precious life over to the addiction that controls them.

Their very life is pawned off to the addiction that drives them.

I have lost friends to addiction over the years.

How does this make me feel? I feel robbed. Addiction is a thief that will take those we love, change them for the worst, control them to the point which we cannot reason with them in the least.

I feel angry that a substance would gain control over and claim the lives of those I hold dear. I feel a little irritated that someone of such worth and potential was robbed because of the destructive and selfish choices they made.

I feel numb.

Our warnings to our loved ones often fall on deaf ears.

This is why their death leaves us numb, angry, irritated and distraught.

Addicts lead dangerous lives. They are often entangled with dealers, many of whom they owe money to. This is only one of the dangers they willingly subject themselves to.

Some cannot bear facing another day if they cannot do so with the drugs that have become their entire life. Because of this, some will choose suicide as a way out.

I have lost loved ones to suicide which was directly related to drugs.

The drugs became everything to them and so, continuing life with the thought of having to do without them, they couldn't comprehend.

My heart and prayers go out to those who have lost a loved one to drug addiction. I do feel your pain. I know the struggle to understand why it had to come to this.

Here's only some of what I've come to understand: An addict is selfish. They don't mean to be, they just are.

When they are driven by drugs, they don't think about us, their loved ones. We seldom cross their minds. When their destructive lifestyle ends up costing them their lives, we are the ones left here to deal with the grief, questions and heartbreak.

There are no easy answers. In life there are very seldom easy answers.

We must learn from the bad and heartbreaking times of life as well as the good and joyous times. This knowledge helps us to live life to its fullest, but is often painful.

Losing an addict to their addiction is in my opinion one of the most painful events we will ever encounter.

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