August 30, 2005

The Seared Conscience of the Sociopath Part 1

1 Timothy 4

Now the Spirit speaketh expressly, that in the latter times some shall depart from the faith, giving heed to seducing spirits, and doctrines of devils;

2 Speaking lies in hypocrisy; having their conscience seared with a hot iron;


1. Anything which impairs the happiness of a being or deprives a being of any good; anything which causes suffering of any kind to sentient beings; injury;

mischief; harm; -- opposed to {good}. Evils which our own misdeeds have wrought. --Milton.

Those who have turned from God and have chosen to serve themselves are those who have had their conscience seared. These people are haughty, high minded and self-centered.

Some may characterize these people as narcissists or sociopaths.

In dealing with the sociopath, many dread to go near them with good reason. One thing is certain, prayer is an absolute must before being in the presence of such people.

What are a few characteristics of the sociopath?

I list these characteristics because they are the primary ones I have personally noted when dealing with the sociopath.

1. One who shows no regard for the feelings or needs of others.

3. Has a grandiose or elitist attitude

3. Displays a horrific sense of entitlement

4. Consumed with both jealousy and envy

5. Shows no empathy nor regard for their fellow human beings.

These people are concerned only with what they can gain out of each and every situation. America is said to be currently bombarded with a "ME" generation. Have you heard the expression, "What's in it for me"? Chances are you've met up with a sociopath who has little or no conscience. Every thing's about them. Constantly being ordered around by someone who won't lift one finger to ever help you, yet they can spew out orders with the greatest of ease? Chances are you have one of these selfish and hurtful people in your life.

These people must be the center of attention at all times. Do not ignore them or you will feel their wrath.

These people secretly feel (although they would never admit to it) as if they're superior to God.

I sometimes wonder if these people don't actually feel that they could rule both heaven and earth better than God himself! Their behavior certainly seems to conclude these assumptions. Sounds like Satan himself doesn't it? He wanted to rule above and to be worshipped by Jesus himself! Now if you have never met a person like this, there is no way for you to understand what it's like in having to deal with them.

These are a lazy bunch
Except when there are reasons not to be lazy and an activity of some sort would benefit them. They prefer not to do menial tasks such as working at a job or even taking out the trash. Chores such as these are beneath them and are seen as unworthy tasks, not suitable for someone of such high stature as themselves.

These people will scheme and con their way through life looking for people who will serve them and their purposes well. It seems at times that they never stop dreaming up ways to get more out of life, but for all their day dreaming, they enlist others to fight their fights for them. They prefer to watch from afar and remain inconspicuous when able, unless there is reason for them to actively participate in the evil they've helped to create.

These people are charmers and flatterers when necessary to further their cause. They know what others want to hear and will heap great praises upon whomever they're trying to con.

They prefer choice seats at restaurants, to them only center stage is satisfactory, never a back seat. Even innocent children can be manipulated, conned and used by them. They are needy, but never thankful or appreciative for anything. You can do for them over and over again and try to please them, but their lifestyle is of the highest maintenance and rest assured, you can never MAKE them HAPPY.

These hard to please people are like spoiled brats. Case is point? Confront them on some issue and let them know that they're wrong. You won't believe the fight you'll be in for and the misery they will attempt to heap upon you. Why would they react this way? So that you won't make the serious error of correcting them again. You will have to seriously weigh whether or not you should attempt to correct them on any issue in the future, no matter how large or small! Such twisted reality craves unending devotion to them -- unquestioning devotion.

Saying No

NO is not in these people's vocabulary. If you tell them no, even for the best of reasons, they will scorn you and resent you.

Try saying no and denying the selfish, self-centered sociopath and see what you get. Most likely they will use GUILT and TEARS to get their way next time. You will be feeling so guilty that you will think twice before using that two lettered word with them again.

Sociopath's never allow you to question them. However, it's totally acceptable for them to question you. What's good for the goose is never good for the gander from their distorted viewpoint. Sulking and tears are only two weapons in their arsenal among a long list of other such manipulative toys.

If you refuse to go along with their twisted and ungodly ventures, prepare to have a bulls-eye permanently tacked to your back because these people will stop at nothing to make you suffer for not bowing down to them. You see, to them you have committed the unpardonable sin. That of willful disobedience toward them, and they won't soon forget it! These people's egos are so large they would fill a Mack truck! But they themselves are small indeed. The longer you know one of them and truly start to understand them, the smaller they seem. Consider the following bible verse in which God describes Satan and compare his description with that of the sociopath. Those people you know who lack conscience :

12 How art thou fallen from heaven, O Lucifer, son of the morning! how art thou cut down to the ground, which didst weaken the nations!

13 For thou hast said in thine heart, I will ascend into heaven, I will exalt my throne above the stars of God: I will sit also upon the mount of the congregation, in the sides of the north:

14 I will ascend above the heights of the clouds; I will be like the most High. 15 Yet thou shalt be brought down to hell, to the sides of the pit.

16 They that see thee shall narrowly look upon thee, and consider thee, saying, Is this the man that made the earth to tremble, that did shake kingdoms;

17 That made the world as a wilderness, and destroyed the cities thereof; that opened not the house of his prisoners?

This verse has always reminded me of those who are selfish and self serving and who care nothing about others. This describes the sociopath or the narcissist well.

Pathological Liars

We all have been lied to. It's pretty much a common occurrence for all of us in life, yet God says that all liars will have their place in hell. With the sociopath, truth is a rarity, whereas lies are the norm. There sometimes seems to be no rhyme or reason for the abundance of lies that spew forth from their lips.

They will lie to you about what you just heard. What you know as a fact, they will label fiction. Even with things that you alone have firsthand knowledge of.

We are told in the BIBLE that one of the things that God hates, one that is an abomination to him, is feet that are swift in running towards mischief. The person I've described to you remains in a state of malicious mischief. They scorn to stay out of trouble and to stop their gossiping and backbiting. They see nothing wrong with their actions. We are to live our lives and carry on with our work in such a way that we keep our heads down, avoid gossip and even the appearance of evil, yet if you tell these people how God desires us to live, it would seem as though you were speaking a foreign language to them. It appears it is not in them to understand godly morals.

August 4, 2005

The Substitutes

subgifRather than learning to be content in any situation we find ourselves in as the apostle Paul describes below, we attempt to apply a quick "fix" to escape the unpleasantness that we experience in our lives.

Philippians 4: 11 Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need. I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me.

More often than not, our "fix" tends to push us toward more unpleasantness and emptiness. Have you ever noticed that drug addicts never feel at peace and contented unless they are high or using?

What have they done? They have substituted the drug for the true contentment that God alone offers them. We could say the same about money. People who feel depressed and unhappy when they have no money to spend have substituted money for a relationship with God that would bring lasting contentment. These substitutes will never measure up and they always fall short of the true contentment that is found in Christ. There is one action common to those who substitute other things for true contentment in Christ:
They keep coming back to their substitute hoping to gain contentment from it, only to be discouraged and depressed afterwards because they never get that contentment.

Why? Because they're trying to fit a square peg into a round hole and it isn't working for them.

Their square peg is their substitute, whether it be drugs, money or other addictions and compulsions. Their round hole is that place of spiritual wholeness. The place at the center of their being which God designed when he created mankind and which is reserved strictly for a spiritual relationship with him.

That which is of the spirit can never be satisfied with the things of this world. John 3:6 That which is born of the flesh is flesh; and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit

That spiritual part of us can never be properly substituted with the things of this world and of the flesh. But oh how we try to gain contentment and satisfaction from those things which will never profit us spiritually such as drugs, jobs, money and material possessions.

Those who do not believe in a creator God and his Son, Jesus Christ, have trouble grasping these truths. In order to understand our use of substitutions I've outlined in this article and the lack they represent in our lives, an individual must first believe that there is a Creator God.

How do we banish these substitutions in our lives? By finally understanding what they are and not being deceived any longer by them. See them for what they truly are - Sorry Substitutions for the true contentment that Christ gives to those who truly desire it. By recognizing the substitutes for the hindrances they are to our own spiritual growth. By knowing that what they offer only leads to more emptiness and depression in our lives. By us taking action now to put them in their proper place in our lives instead of allowing them to be idols in our hearts.


Trying to get lasting contentment out of the things of this world is like pounding your head against a wall and expecting a positive experience with no pain. It just isn't going to happen.

I know people who are still chasing things like money and drugs and they are STILL expecting a good outcome from the emptiness these things repeatedly bring them, some of them have been on this roller-coaster for many years.

These same people wonder why they're often so depressed. They're depressed because trying to gain fulfillment in these things is like trying to handcuff the wind. You can try for the rest of your life but it is not going to happen.

These substitutes will never fill that place God reserved for himself inside of us- his Sprit, they were never meant to. Satan has used them as tools to entice us and to keep us from entering into a true and fulfilling life that only God provides for us in Christ

Satan wants nothing more than for us to keep our focus on and our time wasted on these substitutes *these things of this world*. Satan knows that once our vision is fixed on our creator God and our understanding is enlightened to his (God's) truth, (Satan's) power over us will be broken and his days of deception in our lives are numbered.

We set up idols in our hearts with these substitutes. But we have to wake up out of our sleep. We must take action toward banishing them from our lives while we have the chance. The days of our lives on this earth are but a vapor. One minute we're here, living this life and the next, our lives are over . When your life is over and your eternal life begins, will you find yourselves in heaven or in hell? What are the substitutions you have fallen victim to? What are the things you throw your time and care into on this earth? Do you feel as though you've substituted the things of this world for God?

If you have, please say this prayer with me now and believe it in your heart:

Dear God, I have put things and people in that place that was only meant for you. A relationship with you should have been my number one priority and instead it has not been on my list of things important to me in my life. But I'm trying God, I'm trying to understand that this is not what you want for me because it will leave me empty and cold toward you and your will for my life. I know that your will for my life should be important to me . I pray that you give me ears to hear what your Spirit is trying to tell me. I want lasting peace and contentment that will never be taken away from me and I pray that you would give it to me. I thank you for your mercy that you have given me and everyone else on this earth.
In Jesus name I pray, Amen.