Those who thrive on strife and contention bring untold grief to our lives. These people end up alienating everyone around them. But have you wondered whether it is it right to remove yourself from these characters?
There is no end to the conflict and strife they thrive on. If you've struggled to stay in a relationship with someone whose attitudes and actions repeatedly drain you dry emotionally, it is a given that you must remove yourself from such relationships.
The following are a few scriptures that touch on this important topic:
Proverbs 17:1 Better is a dry morsel, and quietness therewith, than an house full of sacrifices with strife.
Proverbs 21:9 It is better to dwell in a corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house.
Proverbs 22:24 Make no friendship with an angry man; and with a furious man thou shalt not go: 25 Lest thou learn his ways, and get a snare to thy soul.
They learn by example: Are you a doormat for others?
Beside the fact that it quickly becomes YOUR fault if you come back for more misery from these people, you are showing them that to continue their bad treatment toward you or others is OK. You are showing them that there will be no negative ramifications for their actions.
Essentially, you are letting them know that you are their doormat. You can be called on for them to use, abuse and inflict their own chaos and internal anger upon. The problem with these people is not you, it is what is inside of them.
Sadly, these people will not face the internal inspection that is needed, and so they project their negativity and internal emptiness upon you - their nearest and dearest.
Would God have us to be used, abused and repeatedly harmed or harassed by another? No.
There is nothing uplifting and encouraging that comes from being another's doormat or punching bag. God did not create us for such things. He wants better things for us. There is nothing martyr like in sufferings such as these. Living with continual strife and contention in our lives brings on stress as well as numerous other harmful physical effects. Our very health suffers as a result of dealing with such people.
They alienate you
This takes place after you have been their victim for many years. You have most likely experienced years of repeated emotional, physical and mental abuse at their hand.
If you have been alienated from another in this way, please understand that removing yourself from that person in order to protect yourself is perfectly justifiable. Do not carry around guilt over it.
The only choices you had were to:
1. Stay and suffer indefinitely
2. Remove yourself and gain some peace
Only you know the anguish you've endured up to this point and only you can take the steps necessary to stop it.