August 24, 2006

The Seared Conscience of the Sociopath : Part 3


The sociopath is cunning and is able to fly under the radar of most people's perception.
They do this by allowing all but a select few to view their fake facade. The facets of their personality they show to those they choose to impress is very different from those facets that truly reside within them.
To others who they care little about, they are indifferent, cool and smug. They don't spend time or effort wooing those who are seen by them to have nothing to offer to them.

The sociopath will choose victims deliberately

Make no mistake, the sociopath deliberately chooses his or her victims. Then they will impress and charm them until they are giddy. This is why when a victim of the sociopath tries to tell their story, they often are not believed. The charm factor with these people is over the top. The sociopath will lie about others and embellish details of a situation with others. Sometimes there is a "pack" mentality with these people. He or she will actually attempt to draft people into their "army" of discontents. Many have been slandered, humiliated, and unjustly accused by sociopaths. Most of the time they do these things for financial gain and self preservation. But I have seen them do these things when there didn't appear to be a reason. You will never get inside their heads. They are another creature altogether. Don't play games with these people and study them for too long. You will never figure them out or truly understand them. You have a conscience, they don't. Just as you cannot understand the feelings of a computer or any other inanimate object, you cannot understand the feelings of the sociopath or what makes them tick. The pain they inflict on their victims is not felt by them. Empathy is unknown to them, they care nothing for anything except what they want.

What creates the sociopath?

Some say that sociopathy is brought about by heredity and some say the cause is environment. I happen to think that sociopath's are a creation of both heredity and environment in most cases. A child who is born into a life of misery by way of dysfunctional parents will have a tough time. But that same child can and often does survive without being transformed into a sociopath - one without conscience.

Understanding the sociopath

We don't understand those without shame, guilt or conscience. This is another reason why we are apt to overlook, underestimate, or miscalculate those who are sociopaths. We would rather think positive about someone and their actions than negative.

To admit that you have a non-feeling monster as a relative, spouse, or friend is not an easy thing to do.

Those of us who have a conscience would rather believe anything other than that.

And it is in this neglecting of the obvious that our weakness takes root in dealing with these people and can cause us great misery. This neglecting of the obvious causes us to end up being deceived and devastated. We want to believe that there are not people out there walking around who only think of themselves and care nothing about others or their feelings. To us, this is a frightening thought, so we dismiss it and tend to overlook what those without conscience do.

I believe there are more ice people (sociopaths) today in our present culture than at any other time in history.

Sociopath in the Family

What did Jesus say would characterize the last days?

Those days right before his return?

Mark 13: 12 Now the brother shall betray the brother to death, and the father the son; and children shall rise up against their parents, and shall cause them to be put to death.

Friends, those who do these things, betraying a brother or other family member to death can be categorized as sociopathic behavior. Only those without a conscience or a seared conscience would do such things.

Before the return of the Lord, we will not see an escalation of peace but a diminishing of it. Yes, even within our own families.

If you have a sociopath in your family, you have my sympathies. It is hard enough dealing with one you meet casually on the street, let alone dealing with one you must interact with continually because he or she happens to be a family member.

But if this is your situation

1. Keep your distance and if possible establish no contact with them. I say this because it would be totally foolish for you to dream about sharing any positive relationship with them.

They harm others at random without any guilt. How can you share any meaningful relationship with a scorpion?

You cannot, for their sting is painful and persistent, and you must keep your distance. The same applies with the sociopath.
Be warned, the best therapists have seldom made progress with the sociopath.

They are set in their ways and care only for themselves. They have no shame and carry no guilt.
The best one word definition I can think of to apply to them? SELFISH.

84 comments:

Anonymous said...

I don't think it is right to avoid someone because you don't understand them. Obviously sociopaths are different, and just the same those who aren't sociopath are unlikely to ever understand them, however, would Christ have avoided them? Unlikely. I would prefer more information about the sociopath and a better Christian explanation of why sociopathy occurs.
I find it difficult to believe that we can even know for sure what does or does not happen in a sociopaths mind.
I can't claim to know everything about sociopaths, but i do know that God would not have us abandon someone on an assumption. I am not saying to be foolish, I am just saying that prayer is a better alternative to complete avoidance.

Anonymous said...

If you believe this, you've never met a sociopath.

Anonymous said...

After all that I have been reading, I believe that my sister is a sociopath. Her goal seems to be inertia. Unfortunately, she and her two year old daughter are living with me temporarily. My sister is also pregnant. We have a plan to get them out of here. They should be out by June. I choose to let them stay here with my own family of 5 because I feel that it is the right thing to do. We are sacrificing for family member. We do this because we are good people. We see an end in sight. I don't know how the relationship will change once they leave. I'm so apprehensive at this point, because I always feel like I'm on the short end of the stick. Not sure that we could go No Contact, given that there are children involved...

Anonymous said...

do sociopaths change once they recieve Christ? or is it a condition that stays with them/

Anonymous said...

Try being married to one and realising too late his young adult children and exwife are sociopaths too! I was very sick and almost died before my children removed me. But not before loosing thousands of dollars, personal items stolen and dealing with the drug and alcohol abuse he encouraged (or allowed)in his children. He rewarded thier bad behavior and they were never taught boundaries or morals from a very young age. I know we need to pray for everyone, but DO IT FROM A DISTANCE!!! GOD IS WISDOM AND GETTING AND STAYING FAR AWAY FROM SOCIOPATHS IS WISDOM!! REMEMBER-THEY ARE CHOOSING TO BE THIS WAY AND WILL USE YOUR OWN MORALS AND CHRISTIAN VALUES TO FURTHER EXPLOIT AND MANIPULATE YOU!

Anonymous said...

Right on previous poster on your ex wife and children. These people are to be kept at a distance. Ok, can you really hope to change them? tolerate them? how can you change or tolerate a person who has all the characteristics of a snake? That snake may look (at a distance) as if it couldn't hurt a fly but get it up close to your face and then check back with me. Did you get bit? Maybe not but only if that snake had been preying on another prey. That's the only reason you would not be bitten. These people you must keep at a distance they are dangerous and will bleed you of all finances at the drop of a hat.

Anonymous said...

This article is obviously very unbiased and almost to the point of slandering. We all have sociopath characteristics to a lesser or greater degree...that's why 99.999% of us are not saints, we are selfish beings in need of grace.
Now, to come out and describe sociopaths with spiteful and judgmental terms like scorpions and computers is slandering and an attempt to dehumanize them.It is evidence that more research is needed to be done on sociopathy since even the best psychologists don't have enough knowledge on the disorder. All the books and blogs about sociopaths are mere attempts (from a third person) to put out their OWN views (from their encounter or study) on the subject.
For all we know, sociopaths could be grossly misunderstood and the reason one would act out is because everyone zones in on "the sociopath" and anticipates them to do something wrong so they could point their finger and say "AHA! I knew it, he/she is a sociopath!"
It is not in our part to judge so let God decides when He comes. Don't be a hypocrite! examine your own conscience first before you start condemning other creatures of God.

Anonymous said...

I meant to write bias...The article should be unbiased.

Anonymous said...

Read the book THE SOCIOPATH NEXT DOOR by Margaret Stout PsyPhd-Ques T. Mark sounds like a sociopath to me, my response- talk to the hand

Anonymous said...

"This article is obviously very unbiased and almost to the point of slandering."

Huh?

1. Is English your first language?

2. What color is the sky on your planet?

Sociopaths are human wrecking balls. Voluntarily associating with a sociopath is self-injuring behavior. Even if you don't care about yourself, remember that you don't have the right to harm yourself. You owe it to your family, friends and community to maintain your sanity, health and capacity for productivity. A sociopath will attack you on all those fronts, leaving you in need of care from the very people who should be able to rely on you!

Being naive is natural for a young person, but it's not precisely a virtue. Sooner or later exposure to reality should make us wiser. God can heal sociopaths any time he wants to, but make no mistake here: you are not God. If you try to rescue a sociopath, s/he will use you like the disposable, expendable object s/he perceives other people to be.

Anonymous said...

I wasn't a complete sociopath, However I did have tendencies as a child, such as decieving, and manipulating people. I would feel positive emotion towards other people but not much. I became less emotional at 16 for the most part and I was a cynic at the time. As a teenager I went to a church for the first time in years, accepted christ, and got saved. Now apparently I was healed of my sociopathic tendencies and now I care about people and reach out to them, so that they can experience what I have. I didn't want to change but in the end it wasn't my choice it was gods, which proved to me that god loved everyone. I have never done anything real bad to anyone well maybe I lied to a few people, or stole something from them I sometimes feel the urge to screw someone over and manipulate them, but I am able to push the urges out of my mind. the urges to do so are now far and between and almost gone. yes god can heal people and he even gave me a conscience which for most of my life ive never had. I am in my 20's now and truly happy for the first time b/c I feel the way most people do. Yes god can heal anyone. The people who knew me to be a cold, vindictive, heartless bastard are starting to see that im telling the truth and are giving me a second chace...I will not let them down

Anonymous said...

Sociopaths are deeply disturbed people. They are particularly dangerous because of their ability to charm people. They are like camelions - they fit in with whoever they are with - they can pray and worship with Christians, quote Scripture and yet their behavior and lack of Christian values reveals who they really are. Churches are one of their favorite places to find their victims. Please don't be taken in by them. And Mark, who posted the first response - sociopaths all believe that they are great people and see no need to seek help.....that is why it is rare for a sociopath to ever be healed through counseling. God can heal them - but I believe they need to repent and understand their need for healing. When you don't think you have a problem, it is difficult for God to work in your life.

Anonymous said...

New anonymous Jul 30 here:
I see that most bloggers/posters/writers who have never been in a direct relationship with a sociopath [who thought they could gain something from you] will propose that what the bible teaches is wrong, and will pull Christs teaching so far out of context that it becomes unrecognizable.

I have known someone for about 10 years who became what some would call a best friend and yet at the same time I was bothers with his selfish tendencies. He has since sexually assaulted my wife and suggested he had an affair with her and has made up stories about how she was the agressor and instigator and makes no mention of the sexual assualts.

If you do not know a sociopath who lived a life as sociopath changed to a christian continuously right to death and you see them in heaven, you cannot propose that they can be reached by human effort or that they are capable of fulfilling the love one another references that you can find throughout the bible. Loving someone and risking your life with them are two completely different things.

ski said...

New anonymous Jul 30 back:
It seems as though this site is infrequently being read now. It would be good to hear from those that are in the process of building a new life after a meeting a sociopath or those in the process of finding their escape from a sociopath without being caught.

Anonymous said...

I was narcissistic and I married a sociopath. Somehow we survived a relationship for 17 years and produced three children. The emotional and psychological abuse was unbearable but my narcissism saved me from a meltdown. I was protected by my self delusions of perfection. A perfect home, perfect children and a perfect marriage! These thoughts and a perpetual smile saved me from my husbands alcoholism, his adultery and pathalogical lies, not to mention the gradual brainwashing and fog building known as gaslighting. I was a million miles away from God and yet believed he had a special place in his heart for one as uniquely intelligent and creative as me. I could only connect to other narcissists and so the abuse continued into my friendship relationships. I was so concerned with feeding my husbands ego that I sometimes lost the plot with my own children. It was all symptomatic of a spiritless existence that thrived on worldly possessions and gratification. I was the child of a narcissist and had never felt more comfortable as I did with my psychopathic parasite to be. But the truth is I was in a living hell and wanted to escape but didn't know how. God provided the answer because he knew what was in my heart. He taught me to truly love and to focus on my own flaws rather than my husbands. He led me to a church where I was baptized alongside my husband who was terrified that I was going to leave him. The next 7 years were extraordinary and I witnessed within myself the work of christ. I watched the good fruits grow in my children and felt true gratitude. I learnt about humility, and empathy and altruism. My husband however, refused to pick up a bible on the basis that he would only do so if it was in its original text and he could understand ancient aramaic! Needless to say he did not change and eventually I suffered the pain of yet another affair. God showed me an image of the garden of eden and explained that Adam and Eves redemption would happen through the pain of separation. I called an end to our marriage and my husband left to set up home with his new girlfriend. The pain of separation and destruction of my dreams was unbearable but God gave me an inhuman strength to get through. My spirit was released from the bondage of my past and I began to feel myself grow in Christ. So yes, God can heal but only those who call upon him for help. Unfortunately that is a very difficult thing for someone who prefers a fake existence to the one promised by Christ himself. Blessings to all who are in pain, may Jesus keep you safe in his arms from the destructive elements of this life.

Anonymous said...

I was narcissistic and I married a sociopath. Somehow we survived a relationship for 17 years and produced three children. The emotional and psychological abuse was unbearable but my narcissism saved me from a meltdown. I was protected by my self delusions of perfection. A perfect home, perfect children and a perfect marriage! These thoughts and a perpetual smile saved me from my husbands alcoholism, his adultery and pathalogical lies, not to mention the gradual brainwashing and fog building known as gaslighting. I was a million miles away from God and yet believed he had a special place in his heart for one as uniquely intelligent and creative as me. I could only connect to other narcissists and so the abuse continued into my friendship relationships. I was so concerned with feeding my husbands ego that I sometimes lost the plot with my own children. It was all symptomatic of a spiritless existence that thrived on worldly possessions and gratification. I was the child of a narcissist and had never felt more comfortable as I did with my psychopathic parasite to be. But the truth is I was in a living hell and wanted to escape but didn't know how. God provided the answer because he knew what was in my heart. He taught me to truly love and to focus on my own flaws rather than my husbands. He led me to a church where I was baptized alongside my husband who was terrified that I was going to leave him. The next 7 years were extraordinary and I witnessed within myself the work of christ. I watched the good fruits grow in my children and felt true gratitude. I learnt about humility, and empathy and altruism. My husband however, refused to pick up a bible on the basis that he would only do so if it was in its original text and he could understand ancient aramaic! Needless to say he did not change and eventually I suffered the pain of yet another affair. God showed me an image of the garden of eden and explained that Adam and Eves redemption would happen through the pain of separation. I called an end to our marriage and my husband left to set up home with his new girlfriend. The pain of separation and destruction of my dreams was unbearable but God gave me an inhuman strength to get through. My spirit was released from the bondage of my past and I began to feel myself grow in Christ. So yes, God can heal but only those who call upon him for help. Unfortunately that is a very difficult thing for someone who prefers a fake existence to the one promised by Christ himself. Blessings to all who are in pain, may Jesus keep you safe in his arms from the destructive elements of this life.

Anonymous said...

I was narcissistic and I married a sociopath. Somehow we survived a relationship for 17 years and produced three children. The emotional and psychological abuse was unbearable but my narcissism saved me from a meltdown. I was protected by my self delusions of perfection. A perfect home, perfect children and a perfect marriage! These thoughts and a perpetual smile saved me from my husbands alcoholism, his adultery and pathalogical lies, not to mention the gradual brainwashing and fog building known as gaslighting. I was a million miles away from God and yet believed he had a special place in his heart for one as uniquely intelligent and creative as me. I could only connect to other narcissists and so the abuse continued into my friendship relationships. I was so concerned with feeding my husbands ego that I sometimes lost the plot with my own children. It was all symptomatic of a spiritless existence that thrived on worldly possessions and gratification. I was the child of a narcissist and had never felt more comfortable as I did with my psychopathic parasite to be. But the truth is I was in a living hell and wanted to escape but didn't know how. God provided the answer because he knew what was in my heart. He taught me to truly love and to focus on my own flaws rather than my husbands. He led me to a church where I was baptized alongside my husband who was terrified that I was going to leave him.

Anonymous said...

Sorry about the repetition, I'm new to leaving messages and need a crash course on computer speak!

Anonymous said...

I think sociopaths are evil...if you read the description of the devil...you will understand what a sociopath is.....a devil with a smile on their face....and God will deal with them....you will know them by their fruit....and you better run if you meet one because you cannot change them
they will destroy you.... Isn't that also what the devil does???

Anonymous said...

I was married to a psychopath for 4 years. I don't use that term loosely. In the 4 years of marriage I didn't know he was a "psychopath". The judge in our divorce court ordered him to be evaluated and that was when I had first heard that term. A chill went up my spine as I sat and listened to the doctor witness to this. I am a christian. I was a christian when I married him. He said he was a christian. He went through the motions during dating. He deceived me totally. Within one month after being married...he began to show his true self. He was sadistic and just plain evil. He abused the fact that I was a christian and after doing horrible things to me would then quote scriptures..reminding me of how I was supposed to forgive him. He went to prison for 5 years after we divorced for fraud. In those 5 years I tried to visit and bring him bibles and show him the love of God. He said all the right things...but it was never real. After his release he denounced it all. It did become harder for him to deceive and it frustrated him. So the threats started. He would tell me very casually, with no feeling or change in the tone of his voice..that he could kill me and everyone would think I killed myself. He said it in passing...at random...after exhausting all efforts...I decided to completely cut off any communication. I have done all humanly possible so that I am not found. I have a son by him and that is my concern. I have sole custody. To this day, still has no remorse, no regret, no guilt, no feeling. I've never seen him shed a tear. I have watched him trap a raccoon on purpose, with food...only to rip him to shreds with a knife..just because....it is not un-christian to distance yourself from someone like this. In my opinion.....psychopath is the world's definition of defining pure evil....I pray for him....but I do not have to subject myself or my children to him. Only God Himself can save someone like this...that is the only hope.

Anonymous said...

I agree with the comment before mine....if you look at the characteristics of satan....you have just defined a psychopath....evil..that's all it is. Yes..we have all sinned....there is no one in this world who hasn't or who won't.....but then there are those who for whatever reason...have turned themselves over completely.

Anonymous said...

The separation of wheat from torns... the Bible is full of these references.... After being involved with a Sociopath as a friend. Having them charm me, use my contacts for their gain and destroy my relationship with contacts I was devastated. I'm still recovering and found this post while googling about how Jesus deals with a sociopath. I go from wanting to forgive to praying that this person be destroyed and not allowed to hurt others.

This person recently had a child and I find myself praying that his wife would open her eyes and see that the delusion of the perfect family with the exceptional handsome husband is just that a fantasy.

I remember him telling me stories about his wife who he only recently married how she was controlling, unsophisticated and how he felt trapped. I realized now ALL lies.

It's also important I believe for those that are or have been involved with sociopaths to be honest about what draws them to these kind of individuals. I can honestly say that I have a handful of reasons. I was charmed by his beauty, I was abused as a child and at the time cut off emotionally to deal with my circumstance so I recognized and somehow felt comfortable with his lack of emotion.

For the moment I have chosen to keep my distance and pray. Unless God specifically places me in a situation with this person and instructs me what to do I believe that the best way to deal with these kind of people is to pray for them from afar.

Your compassion with these kind of people is what they look for to victimize you and other

a sociopath said...

I think that no one really knows a sociopath unless you are one. Obviously all of you are claiming that you are not a sociopath, so how in your right mind, do you think you have the intelligence to know what a sociopath does or what a sociopath feels? You people are foolish.

Anonymous said...

Yep, the one who just accused everyone that knows a sociopath of being one is obviously one. Sociopaths project - project - project their own issues on others. I agree that they are 'children of the devil' and 'do the desires of their father, the devil', just as Jesus said. They 'honor God with their lips, but their hearts are far from Him'. They 'play god' and are incredibly narcissistic (ego, pride, power, control). The most interesting thing is, though, is that they're paranoid, too. This deep-rooted fear is what motivates them to compete, control and dominate. As soon as they feel out of control, they feel entitled to bullying anyone, especially Christians, into bailing them out, even by force. If met with opposition, threats, intimidation and even violence are paramount.

They like to isolate the people they maniuplate, too. They don't want you talking to anyone about personal matters and will accuse you of the sin of gossiping or threaten to bad-mouth you to everyone you know...they are terrified of having their 'game' found out. They 'hide' in the church, falsely professing to be a 'Christian'. How much more 'antichrist' can one be? Satan disguises himself as an angel of light, and so do his kids.

Let's assume these people have a mental illness...if they CARED (conscience) about harming themselves and others, they would eagerly seek help through medication and therapy, and REAL salvation. They wouldn't WANT to harm other people. The Bible says their 'consciences are seared with a hot iron'. Satan and his kids get a charge out of it. Satan quotes the Bible, too ~ always has. The Bible says we are to avoid those who have the 'form of godliness, but deny its power' (the Holy Spirit) and tells us not to associate with 'so-called brothers'. The advice given here is outstanding. Those who've experienced the wounds of sociopaths KNOW this blog is right on the mark.

Anonymous said...

I was with a sociopath for two years...... Today I am depleted , exausted, pennyless and hurt. We use to go to Church together and i must say that even then he was trying to Manipulate God by playing the pity card ....I prayed for a long time and asked God to show me the truth... Today God has given me the knowledge and the insight of who I was really dealing with ...I pray for my sociopath ex fiancee but I have to stay away from him because he will draw me into is vortex souless hole...Anyone who has not met a sociopath cannot judge us from wanting ( or have some energy left)to running away from them.

Matt said...

Sociopaths can change and I am living proof of that. I know what a sociopath thinks and feels and both are usually about ones self. I am the one who posted about the sociopathic tendencies as a child. I wasn't born that way but I believe that being molested by a guy on the street for a month, two, or 3 possibly even most of a year. Outdoors near wooded area near my house is where this happened. I also went through years of emotional abuse and I have been hit a number of times. I think that may have had something to do with the fact I was a sociopath. I am here to say once again that god can heal those who suffer with this disorder. It has been nearly two years since I posted and now the sociopathic urge to deceive and manipulate others is gone. I now help people and I enjoy inspiring others and making them happy. The people around me are no longer skeptics to my healing. I stand for god and I stand for the church that helped get me out of the what I now call empty existence of being a sociopath. I have love and peace in my heart so please don't write off a sociopath of being incurable. God did for me what I believe no therapy could have done. God is good. :)

Anonymous said...

Ok woman who was with a sociopath for two years. I used to be one and by all means I understand why you wouldn't want to go back. Maybe you need to pray that god puts it in his heart to want to change. People who were kind enough to give me the time of day really helped. I swear to god that I saw a guy blow out his knee and felt no concern. I didn't feel at funerals. In the year 2008 I actually felt torn up inside at funerals and I cried at a funeral for the first time. I kept on praying to be delivered but at my grandmothers funeral I realized I was healed because I actually felt something when someone close to me died. Same thing for my grandfather on my moms side of the family. I felt sad looking at an empty chair he used to sit in. I finally felt empathy for my grandfather who lost his wife of 48 years. He was on the dads side of the family. I know I'm healed because I can finally feel. Don't write him off as being incurable. God delivered me from that existence and I thank him for it. Don't give up hope for a sociopath but also keep your eyes open too.

Anonymous said...

This article is BANG ON! I am a Registered Nurse with a generous and giving personality which attracts sociopaths so I know all about them! Prior to giving my heart to Jesus, I was in a live-in relationship with one. He was a pathological liar and a MASTER MANIPULATOR! He had such a strange personality I was impressed to go online and put in some of the traits about him that I had observed...up came the word SOCIOPATH! BINGO!!! After I became a Christian I tried to help one, who came on as a needy desperate young woman with six kids. I catered to her needs for almost six months before I realized, based on everything that I had observed, that she and the two other female adults who lived in the horrible and filthy conditions with her were all sociopaths... parasites! Even as a Christian, there is only ONE thing you can do for a sociopath...PRAY THAT GOD GIVES THEM A CONSCIENCE! And pray for yourselves that God gives you the gift of discernment!

Anonymous said...

regarding the comment "This article is obviously very unbiased and almost to the point of slandering." please be aware unbiased means unprejudiced . . .perhaps you really meant to say "biased" meaning prejudiced. . . that having been said I agree with others who commented "you must not have ever met a sociopath" . I ve known a few and they truly are not to be understood but rather avoided at all cost.

Anonymous said...

My son married 8 years to sociopath and they have a 5 year old daughter, my only granddaughter. By coincidence sociopathic daughter-in-law and I work together. Four years ago my son went into major depression, didn't work for two years, and now several years later he is very anxious, depressed, takes heavy medication that makes him like a zombie. She has berated him, verbally abused him, alienated him from his long time friends, smeared our family name at work and is currently trying to get me fired. She has told everyone he is lazy and won't work. She has told the granddaughter lies about me because the granddaughter loves me very much and loves to be with me. She is keeping her away from me as much as she can except when she needs me to keep her. She also has about a Stage 2 hoarder house and getting worse all the time. The child is so precious and adorable, smart and caring and makes friends easily - no signs of being a sociopath herself. I am so worried about the child and my son. He is like a POW survivor. I have tried to help him but she undermines my efforts. She has him like she wants him. It appears that she is having an affair with a coworker as well. Luckily, most coworkers know her for what she is and they hate her and fear her. In fact it was a coworker who informed me that she is a sociopath because he has had extensive therapy for having had a sociopathic step-mother after his own mother died when he was very young child. I read the book The Sociopath Next Door and it was as though it was written about my daughter-in-law. I feel so used and abused. I have shoveled tons of money to her out of guilt over my son not working. Now I realize it's her fault he is in the state he is in. I have made myself a door mat for her, doing everything she wanted, etc. and now she has turned against me for some unknown reason. I stay away from her as much as possible, but since she is in my family and also a coworker, it is almost impossible to avoid her as much as I need to. How can I keep her from making my life so miserable and controlling me in this way? How can I not worry about my son and granddaughter and the devastating effects on them? How can I get them to not have a hoarder house? I certainly cannot have that "talk" with her because she would resent me even more and would make her more determined not to clean up just to spite me. Any advice or comments on my situation? I don't believe I have ever seen anything about someone in my situation with a sociopath both in the family and at work. Help please anyone!!!

Erica Jones said...

I read both sides of the arguements. I agree with both whole heartedly. I have been searching for christian ways to deal with a sociopath and learn more about them. I had the pleasant experience of knowing a narcissist and boy are they dangerous. So if a sociopath is worse than a narcissist , then please heed our warnings about sociopaths. For the love of God stay away from them because I think the only difference between a narcissist and a sociopath is that a sociopath would actually kill someone and that is sooo hard for me to say that because other people are right, who are we to judge them for we do not know what is in their hearts and minds but on the other hand if you ever had to deal with one, you would understand the dangers. I PROMISE you. However, I am going to continue to search on how to deal with them christianly because it cant be right to avoid them or treat them hostile either. Theres got to be away. Remember stay safe, we warn you because we have been there!

Anonymous said...

How is it "not Christian like" to AVOID SOCIOPATHS??? Are you people kidding me??? We aren't supposed to sit at the same table with thieves and liars, but for some reason a sociopath needs our help? FORGET THAT! Plant your mustard seed of faith on them and then RUN and NEVER LOOK BACK. I am trying to figure a way to sneakily leave my sociopathic husband -- we have a baby together and it's VERY difficult. DO NOT WASTE YOUR TIME ON THEM. IT'S OKAY...Pray for them, but preserve yourself to fight another day. -er

Anonymous said...

Jesus said "Don't cast your pearls to swine", We can pray for sociopaths, but we can also avoid them.

Anonymous said...

Jude 1:12-23 NLT

When these people eat with you in your fellowship meals commemorating the Lord’s love, they are like dangerous reefs that can shipwreck you. They are like shameless shepherds who care only for themselves. They are like clouds blowing over the land without giving any rain. They are like trees in autumn that are doubly dead, for they bear no fruit and have been pulled up by the roots. They are like wild waves of the sea, churning up the foam of their shameful deeds. They are like wandering stars, doomed forever to blackest darkness.
Enoch, who lived in the seventh generation after Adam, prophesied about these people. He said, “Listen! The Lord is coming with countless thousands of his holy ones to execute judgment on the people of the world. He will convict every person of all the ungodly things they have done and for all the insults that ungodly sinners have spoken against him.”
These people are grumblers and complainers, living only to satisfy their desires. They brag loudly about themselves, and they flatter others to get what they want.
But you, my dear friends, must remember what the apostles of our Lord Jesus Christ said. They told you that in the last times there would be scoffers whose purpose in life is to satisfy their ungodly desires. These people are the ones who are creating divisions among you. They follow their natural instincts because they do not have God’s Spirit in them.
But you, dear friends, must build each other up in your most holy faith, pray in the power of the Holy Spirit, and await the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ, who will bring you eternal life. In this way, you will keep yourselves safe in God’s love.
And you must show mercy to those whose faith is wavering. Rescue others by snatching them from the flames of judgment. Show mercy to still others, but do so with great caution, hating the sins that contaminate their lives.

Miserable Wife said...

I have been married to a sociopath for 25 years. I met him when I was a naive, gullible 16 y/o who was too busy being impressed that any guy would notice me to bother having any standards of my own. Unfortunately, it didn't take long for me to experience the lying, manipulating side of him and feel the pain & heartache of that. Ohhh how I deeply regret today that I didn't RUN when this 1st started happening: telling me that he had to "meet a family member at the airport" and then discovering that he was at a bar with another girl, yet when I dared to even casually dance with another guy, he dumped his drink all over me & left! Then there was the lack of any ambition -- didn't want to attend college, had a menial job that he actually PAID an employment agency to get yet would call in sick just because. Unfortunately, instead of seeing this behavior for what it was, having been raised by a codependent mother and suffered abandonment by a father who left when I was 10, I had already "latched on" to him for everything it was worth and convinced myself that it would get better, he would change, etc. I brought him to church w/me and a deacon soon approached him & asked if he wanted to be saved. He said yes, but clearly this was not due to any conviction of the Holy Spirit, thus he was back to being his old self very shortly thereafter. He grew up in a household where his mom cheated on his dad but nobody ever really dealt with it. As a child he was accused of burning down a barn and later of stealing from his first employer. I look back now & see that allll the signs were there!! Now, I am married w/3 kids and don't want to divorce because it would tear my kids apart, although God knows they are undoubtedly also wounded every day seeing his juvenile tantrums, pouting, storming off, etc. He mostly targets my little girl, age 10, and I think he is a "woman hater." I've also found homosexual porn on his computer. Needless to say, I live a celibate life and struggle daily with the question of, "God, HOW do you want me to carry on in this MISERABLE existence??!" It sounds heartless, but my only thought for relief is that maybe he will die an early death.

Anonymous said...

If your husban is a sociopath, please don't stay for the children's sake. My mom stayed with my dad (who is a sociopath) who literally tried to kill us on many occasion s. we suffered so much. Please, don't put your kids through what my brothers and I went through.

And for those who say you shouldn't avoid sociopaths, clearly you have never met one. They are not to be entertained nor should they be trusted. My father is a sociopath who manipulate and ruins peoples lives all the time. I am an adult now in a healthy marriage. I am a missionary, and both of my brothers are healthy. This is by God's grace- real talk. Trust me when I say- stay clear of them.

Anonymous said...

Wow I was 16 wen I got wit this 40yr old man who took care of me and everything. I'm 18 now and no I have to leave him. Its just I'm dependant on him matriaistically but emotonally he is draining me. He's a black whole who cheats on me but he too good t let me catch him bc my anger always gets in the way. I feel like this man had potential to b a great human being but life mde him apsycho path. He got molested at 8 hismothr threw him out at that age b.c she had 9 kids nd was poor. he grew up a male prostitue nd his bestfrid was basically his pimp. He and his frieds r pedophiles. there's a whole gng of him of his boys from when they were all little. A psychopath is basically smeone who sustained much emotional pain and never felt\acknowledged it, there fore they become numb. And learn to live off of short lived pleasures. I can say this b.c I now have a psychopathic metality only b.c of his emotionless towards me and me constanly giving him love I have nothing for mysef and i feel like somethin died just dnt know what. Prob my love for him. But now I'm stuck with a psychopathicmentality covering my head nd jesus calling me in the back. Nd this is a sign to leave asap. A psychic told me if I stay with him I will b miserable hell leave me and I wud start selling myself b.c my family left me b.c I chose him. Nd well I guess god wants me to have a chance to rekindle with my mom leave him nd start fresh with real love and honesty. Ugh these ppl r terrble the only way around them is to literally not feed into anything the say. Don't have an oppion. listen more then talk and watch actions not wrds but only when there telling a story. They open up more b.c they either worry ur not reacting to them or feel comfortable enough to keep opening up more b.c they think ur stupid and won't notice how everything they say nd do isone big contradiction. Also its a personailty disorder basically a person who lives life with beliefes they learned but don't acully believe. And If they deny there own soul how can they accept yurs?

Anonymous said...

Ohh also to the cmmnt I just left about being 16 wth the 40 yr old and now I'm 18. He always told me he liikesto make ppl miserable. He liked to fukc with their heads ndjust make em miserable and when I asked y he didn't even noe he just liked misery. I.e good verses evil. We r gods in training nd ppl like this will either train u for hell or ull train for god

Anonymous said...

The bibles says I its self. The people who apear the most holy giving donations and ging to church r the evilest ones.

Lisa Simes said...

I have recently lived through this sociopathic behavior with my daughter in law. She cons and manipulates everyone that does good for her, and constantly gives all the time. When you don't believe her lies anymore and stop giving to her, she turns on you like a snake and wants nothing to do with you. Even when you say sorry or apologize, she is totally cold and has no response at all. She lives between her texting, cell phone and her laptop, has no interaction with her own kids, she does nothing for them, does not read to them, does not wash clothes, cook, nothing. She is like in her own Cocoon or Shell, that no one can enter into at all. When you try to talk with her, she hears nothing you say unless its money or something she wants and you are offering to buy it for her. its very sad for me.

Anonymous said...

To all of you who think your so Christian, you don't even know your own Bible ! NIV-Matthew 7:1 says 1. Do not judge out you too will be judged. 2.For in the same way you judge others you will be judged and with the measure you use it will be measured to you. Silly Cristian wanna be! Are you sure you don't have sociopathic renuncies? What a disgrace!

Anonymous said...

Correction- that typo was sociopathic tendencies for those of you who can't figure it out on your own. I hope you can guess what the other one is or you really don't know your Bible.

Anonymous said...

A lot of really insightful interesting posts with the exception of the poster before me. I believe what we call a sociopath is indeed with evil spirits, possessed by demons. Perhaps an exorcism, performed in the spirit with which Christ cast out demons, would help a sociopath. But we can't rely on exorcisms. If you have children with a sociopath, the well being of your children and their future desperately depends on your distance from the evil partner. The poster above who stated that he is cured from sociopathy was not a sociopath. His sociopathic disposition was an effect of the early abuse. Fortunately he was able to find God in his heart. Some people are infected by demons sent from Satan and only Jesus or the disciples whom he granted the ability to exorcise can treat them. Of their own free will they will not repent. They are doomed to burn in hell.

Anonymous said...

Just make sure you don't mix up a Sociaopath with a person with Aspergers. There are many similarities - and sometimes people have both... so some of the symptoms are because of a brain difference, and some from past abuse. I pray this is the case with my husband... he's my Jackle and Hyde. I never know when the claws are going to come out. Then I'm just dumped with adrenalin that feels like needles that pour into my chest and arms.. it's physically painful. I'm going to consult with someone soon to get some help on how to set boundries as we've been married 23 years and have 4 kids. He's a Christian and prays and loves God. He's always, sorry, but admits that he just wants to be mean sometimes, and kind of gets a charge out of it. God sees how much I'm begging for healing and change. GOD SEES.

Anonymous said...

I'm grateful with all the comments of your experiences and facts of a sociopath. I alway. ask myself what would Jesus do? And I know that I might be wrong but my conscious always leads me to forgive him. I fight with my thoughts after his childish ways and runs aways when he feels threatened but I know his mind is sick and his own selfish pain(numb)is greater than mine.I pray to God to change his ways but I know if I don't walk away He will never come to his own reality and acknowledge his disorder. I know we try to do what is God's to do and not ours. I'm pregnant and He has shown me his feelings are more important than his own child. He is jobless,law breaker,addict, immature,insecure,controlling,impulsive lier,irresponsible and list goes on and on.
I try to understand before I'm understood but I know He is not a healthy person and I don't want my child(his child)to be hurt by his own father.HELP

Anonymous said...

Once you know the truth about psychopathy/sociopathy, you will see that the Bible is full of examples of them and how we are to treat them. We have taken on the way the world deals with things and incorporated these ways so deeply into our churches that few can discern the difference. We have been so indoctrinated into thinking that we are all the same (we are all sinners yes, but we are NOT all diabetics, hemophiliacs, or psychopaths, but can you see how they twist it to make us think we are all exactly the same?). (Psychopaths don't think they are sinners, they really believe they are without sin and believe they are God.) We have also been trained to believe that we humans can and should try to fix everyone ourselves. That with love we can heal all wounds. But guess what? Psychopaths brains aren't wired to process the emotion of love. Their brains don't process shame, guilt or gratefulness either but instead are full of a deep greed and hatred for all. They don't process empathy either and as a result, they have no idea what others think or feel but don't be mislead here. They are very good predators and are always looking at others and at their responses to see where your weaknesses are and this is where they'll attack/exploit you. But they can only GUESS at how you feel by your responses because they don't think of others as anything but beings they can manipulate. Your best defense is to NOT do the social norms if you are safe and not being threateded. This alone may make them pass you on by as you don't deserve to be graced with their great presence. (This is A GOOD THING!) When you refuse to say the right thing or preform the expected duty, it's amazing what you'll see. Most psychopaths will just shut down and stare if you don't respond at all or if you act as though you don't care. This is the everyday psychopath, the more dangerous ones you will need to protect yourself. They LOVE what they are, have no doubt about this.

We are commanded first to love, but this is something psycopaths cannot do and what's more, they use the love in our heart that was meant to be used for God's glory, as a way to control and manipulte us. (Again, pay attention to these commands and ways we are to check ourselves because they can be markers of one who is incapable of this, incapable of feeling love.) (One more thing here, when people try to help psychopaths by showing them love and social norms, the psychopaths will end up being even more devious than before because they are now able to better mimic the right responses and can gain this access to others. Just like their father the devil who can APPEAR beautiful, it is all a ploy and a facade used to ensnare others.) This is an abomination to God but most Christians are easy pickens because we were never taught the truth about what God said about truly evil people.

Anonymous said...

cont.
Use the greats in God's word to see how we are to treat evil people. Jesus himself said in John 8:43-45 that some people belong to their father the devil and that they WANT to carry out their fathers desire. When Korah (this man was a classic psychopath) came against Moses, what was the result? (Numbers 16) And Pharoah too was probably one. Did God tell Moses to snuggle Pharoah and try to understand his childhood? Was Korah encouraged to be himself as we are all good inside? No. God showed that when one is evil inside you are to speak the truth and then leave them to their own filth and that God will handle them. David's son Absalom too sounds like one. This too is a good example of the heartbreak we parents go through when we realize one of our children is a psychopath. (It's a highly inherent trait according to one doctor.) Abigail and Nabal. Nabal too was a psychopath (I only wish that God would destroy all the psychopaths in our lives the way he did to Nabal when Abigail told him the truth). Cain, the first human born to man was a psychopath and from his lineage came the second murderer written about in the Bible and this same man was also the first polygamist (Genesis 4:23).

We get confused when we read God's word but God is NOT the God of confusion. Please prayfully read through His word and ask him to reveal his truth to you. He is always faithful to do this. When we are told to first make sure that the plank in our own eye is removed, well, people with a conscience do this automatically (those who have some age and wisdom) but keep something in mind. When someone is UNABLE to do this, (to look introspectively first), this may be a sign/example to the rest of us that this person may be unable to do this. Being incapable of gaining insight into their behavior, being unable to truly learn from the past (they may claim to have learned but by their actions you can see they haven't and the memories are often NOT what actually happened)and can't plan for the future, are all traits of a psychopath. (They may talk about plans they have but they are never able to carry them out if it involves being consistant or being responsible.) They MUST receive praise and glorification for every single thing they do. Like their father the devil, their main motivations are to dominat/manipulate others and to be worshiped. This is ALWAYS true about psychopaths and always true about the devil.

Anonymous said...

cont. 3
When you serve as a servant of Jesus, it is not as a mindless serving drone. Jesus did NOT bow down to the devil when he was tempted in the wilderness. He refuted him through Gods word and this is how we too are to refute evil. For each situation we have many ways of dealing with things. Sometimes Jesus was silent, sometimes he spoke in parables, on and on and we too can use his many ways of handling things. One author pointed out that Jesus NEVER told people they were okay if they weren't. He had to deal with EVERY TYPE OF PERSONALITY when he was living here on earth, and if you read his word you will see the ways to handle these people. Jesus did not pray for the devil nor did he tell us to pray for him. But he did and does pray for our PROTECTION from the evil one. (John 17:15)

Also, people who are constantly pointing out your "flaws" even though it is supposed to help you be a better Christian, this is actually keeping our eyes off God. These people are nothing but manipulation-machines and when someone does this consistantly, they are probably a psychopaths and just say what Paul did in 1 Cornthians 4:1-5.

We are to resist the devil so that he will flee from us but it's hard to do this if you don't know the truth about him. All the words asst with the devil apply to the psychopath. The Accusor. Pay attention because every word out of their mouth is some form of an accusation.

Okay, here's some verses and if you look you will find many more. 2 Tim 3:1-5 can be used a checklist. If a person is a psychopath they will fit every single description here just keep your eyes open and at the end of it it tells us what to do with them which is to have nothing to do with them. Proverbs 8:12-15. Isaiah 25:10. Some terms also signify a psychopath in the Bible like fool, evildoer, troublemaker, wicked, and more if you look

Anonymous said...

cont.
It's supposed to read Isaiah 26:10 NOT 25:10.

Stephen said...

I'm convinced Jesus new about Sociopaths and Psychopaths (a long with everything else that was and will be)..and that some of his sayings are directly related to psychopathy and narcissism. How many times does it read, "And He, knowing their hearts..." Sociopaths are often the rich and elite and live their lives outwardly what the world glorifies, check out your next CEO or big business man who walks over 'the little people'. They make great psychologists, and even Priests! They are likely serving a functional purpose of "Evil" in this world and can masquerade right down to going to church. The Wichita BKT Killer was a sociopath and a devout churchgoer and had a position in the church. Jesus called some of the pharisees, scribes and saducees children of the devil (not children of Abraham)...saying "You're father is the devil!"...sociopaths have no conscience of ears to hear ...and they will lie and cheat as a normal way of life but to them it is not such. only because society says so..."the father of lies, lied from the beginning..there is no truth in him". We tend to reduce everything to psychology but I suspect there is way more going on here than one might think, what about the Nephilim? Was that an outward manifestation of what is now an inward reality?

Anonymous said...

Thanks Goodness I hit on this site and blog spot for the first time today. To the site's main narrator ... I only read Demon -Oppression or Possession and this one I'm writing on and you really have great way of getting your word out. Seriously you write plain & simple enough to reach everyone but have complex thought organization in your sentence structure so it's intelligent without being "preachy". And many of the comments are so good. Anyway, those topics and a couple things you alluded to are current to me but I'm wondering why here and at this one other place I forget name but I had searched 'satanic narcissist' and it was a good one like here but less religioius. More talking about NPD and wondering if they're demonic. Here you say it like it is. And I believe we are at end times because the spiritual war that has been waged is so long but esp it seems after WWI like it was implemented then politically. Totally trending now. This Luciferian Illuminati talk and the symbols everywhere. I'm wondering why more people aren't talking about cults. You used the words seared and harrassed and even talked about the evil father bearing bad fruit. And also the thing about confronting the truth the only way. Well I think lots of people are missing a link here by not connecting the dots or refusing to see (because it's harsh and also designed this way) but it's kind of obvious to me that they are in denial that there does exist multi-generational occult practice and other programming. It's done by family members and the government. It sounds conspiracy theory so it's dismissed but that's because the fragile psyche can't handle or the busy person can't deal with it now. But we are harrassed by evil groups including demons and the government and gang stalkers. I think the plot here is to create so many with no

Anonymous said...

CONTINUED ... NO empathy and as you pointed out not all abused people repeat the cycle but many do become the monster they were inteded to if you read the experiments of say MK Ultra and like that. Or SRA cases. Extreme abuse is mostly what creates NPD and they also attribute to being spoiled. Or is that an excuse because their Ego "alter" can't admit that they weren't loved and admired. That they were programmed to be a piece of shit and make more shit. My father was a narcissist I always thougtt that just meant selfish. He likec to build me up and tear me down. It was a game to see if he could make me cry. I recently pieced some things together and he was part of one of those CIA/Military experiments and I was born in the yrs that Monarch Programming was officially on yet many say it continues and that was the point, programmed offspring. And on my Mothers side a Freemason family she felt she didn't want to be too near. The attachment style of their parenting was dismissive to say the least. Because he's a monster or demonically possessed - that cluster set of personality disorders really are ... all of them. And she was overwhelmed. Just like I am after recently getting out of a relationship with a malignant narcissist. But I'm starting to wonder if he wasn't really my 'handler' in the devils plot. Hired by the Government to gaslight me. Or experiment somehow. I just know that the whole deal seems to be to create this society that could pull the plug on fellow man anytime. It's a dawg eat dawg or NPD Demons everywhere(lets make the D stands for Demon nowinstead of disorder) :). Or Zombie Apocolypse coming soon. But few yrs back we really did seem to be more caring for each other. The massive donations for Katrina or the Tsunami. As I just wrote that my mind jumped to what if those were engineered by that HAARP machine in Alaska and the Government collected the money but didn't donate much or really even share it? They used it to buy goods for the FEMA death camps. That sounds plausible to me. Because if they didn't care about us the taxpayer back in the 50's or whatever to start military experiments they sure don't care now. In fact nobody does. Least of all the Narcissit in someone's life which is what started this blog for me. Peace

Anonymous said...

The pastor of a church in town has been completely duped by a sociopathic school administrator - so much so, that the administrator (a flirtatious woman who speaks falsehoods with skill and ease) has convinced the pastor (a man) to run for the school board. The pastor refuses to acknowledge any of her evil doings. I wish the pastor knew that when she first came to town, she asked people what church would give her the most trouble, because that was the one she would join. I don't think sociopaths can be healed by grace or medicine. I think we need to pray for them, but mostly we need to steer clear of them. They are dangerous wolves in sheep's clothing, Matthew 7:15.

Anonymous said...

If you are in a relationship with a sociopath, as I am, I live apart from him now, but stay in touch. He has been my husband for 14 years. My advice is distance yourself, PRAY like you have never prayed before. Pray the prayer of spiritual warfare. Break bonds, spells, any exposure to occult (Freemasons) sets up for demonic oppression/possession. Remember, Christ dealt with an especially tough case that required "fasting AND praying"

Try that. get on the phone to a prayer hotline and ask them to uphold the prayer to as many prayer warriors in their organization for as long as feasible. Some will pray over your request for up to two weeks. sustained prayer and fasting...learn and use all the power you have in Christ's name to bind the evil devices of any nature holding your loved one in bondage. Then pray to "wrap a hedge of protection around them".

Burned by the devil said...

Psalm 17 v 8:14. I read this daily after only a 3 month liason with a sociopath. Didn't know what hit me! Went through all the stages... finally have reached PITY for the pathetic soul...who created it? why? why was it in my path? Evil to the nth degree and SO slick. But you know what? i have never felt so close to God and Jesus in my whole life, because that is the only refuge from these people. But i have chosen to learn as much as possible about them.... they are in our population about 1 in 25, possibly increasing. KEEP AWAKE PEOPLE. DO NOT TRY TO HELP THEM IN ANY WAY!!!! They are God's problem. And they will have a choice... which of them will choose correctly? Hard to say, but don't wait for it to happen, it only makes them feel more powerful. They are actually TERRIFIED of us...

Anonymous said...

To the sociopaths:
I've known several sociopaths -- and yes you were all very intelligent. But tell me this -- what good is a million dollars in the hands of a five year old? The money would be put to no good use because the five year old doesn't have that ability.
I have an IQ of 170 and can out-think most of you, but that isn't the point -- the point is like the five year old you can't go to the beach and build a sandcastle, you can only destroy. You don't have the ability to create, or if you do, you compulsively destroy those things you've made.

You naively confuse lack of desire to destroy with inability and you tell yourself you are better than everyone.

The worst of you commit horrid acts and think yourselves powerful. You aren't powerful, you are broken -- and you know it -- and you hate it and you hate all the world because of it.

I don't pretend to know how you feel but when I try to imagine it all I can picture is a black hole. The star is dead because all that made it useful is gone and all that is left is something dark, pulling in everything around it and destroying it.

I am sure sociopaths can come to Christ and when it truly happens it must be miraculous to see. In Gods eyes we are all as evil as sociopaths, and through Christ's blood we are all forgiven our nature's. Only by a work of God could a sociopath be healed, but God is merciful and if you draw close to Him he will draw close to you.

Human said...

No, we are not all as evil as sociopaths. “Normal” people have a conscience and a capacity for empathy and remorse. We don’t callously exploit or abuse other living souls, and neither do we lie and con as sociopaths do. Click my name to learn more!

Anonymous said...

Anyone here who is trying to defend sociopaths or guilt trip us into having empathy for them has definitely never met a sociopath. Escaping a sociopath is like battling Satan first-hand. They are pure evil. They are devils who walk among us.

Anonymous said...

I dont think they can be saved. Their brains dont work correctly. God can do anything but only to the willing. Socopaths think your the one messed up not them.

Anonymous said...

Anyone can be saved... God does the saving, look at Saul/Paul, read Romans.... That being said, and after two -three years of book reading, researching, counseling, and 23 years married to someone who exhibits no guilt, remorse, or existence of a conscience, I would say the article was a gentle explination of the reality of living or dealing with such people.

I believe we should pray for their salvation, I believe that Proverbs is full of our a Father's wisdom to avoid such people if possible. I have stayed in a marriage because I have no Biblical grounds for divorce. I am distraught and devasted, constantly battling the attacks from with out and within...

There is another element that is important to remember. What and who does God say our battle is with? Not things we can see, but the principalities of Darkness, satan and his demons.... Our battles are spiritual. Through my relationship with my husband, God has become so much bigger and more real than He ever would have been if I hadn't had such a real experience with the Darkness that is ever present in my life 24/7...

I don't fault anyone who has empathy for these people. They have never danced with the devil to the degree that I, and others have had too. To those who have two stepped with the tornado, my christian counselor said to me once, " the trick is getting off the merry-go-round with out breaking your neck."

God Bless, listen to the victims, and don't judge them they have been through so much and your judgement and unbelief might be the last straw...

Anonymous said...

When your reputation, health, finances and peace have been ruined by one you will change your mind

Anonymous said...

My ex Nathan has had the same effect on his siblings, childen and ex lovers too. He is without any regard for anyone and continues to fool most of his neighbors and coworkers. Sad thing is his family covers for him!

Anonymous said...

I agree. My husband is so vindictive, such a liar, will have sex with anyine, all the while quoting God and being digusted by news reports of people doibg exacly what he is doing. Dont walk...run away when you realize who they are

Anonymous said...

Why do the heathen rage? Judge means also to discern one thing from another. You can do that..what we cannot do is condemn.

Anonymous said...

I think I am married to a sociopath. married 18 years. 3 children. I want to follow God's will and what is biblical regarding our marriage, but I am so miserable and heart-broken. He continues to use drugs every chance he gets, justifying by saying its "not that much" "hardly ever" yet has had 2 drug charges in the last 2 years. Does God really want me to stay in this relationship?

Unknown said...

Will only add I believe the unforgivable sin is when someone willingly turns their life over to Satan, thus becoming his "seed"/child. This one cannot repent and turn back. Just as God's children are born again, receive eternal life, and are heaven bound, the devil's children are locked in to his life and ways.

Unknown said...

P.S. One can only discern this condition via revelation from God.

Unknown said...

We do not choose to be this way. Most of the time we don't even know we are sociopaths. Not all sociopaths are liars either. We just don't feel things as you do. It would be great to experience the feeling of love as everyone describes it. But we cant. So on top of the self torture we experience due to not being able to feel certain ways that we should we have to deal with people saying avoid us at all costs. We are still people. What would you think if you were unable to love or mourn your friends and relatives deaths. To quite robin Williams in "Bicentennial Man" "it is so cruel that you can cry and I cannot".

Kyle Baker said...

We do not choose to be this way. Most of the time we don't even know we are sociopaths. Not all sociopaths are liars either. We just don't feel things as you do. It would be great to experience the feeling of love as everyone describes it. But we cant. So on top of the self torture we experience due to not being able to feel certain ways that we should we have to deal with people saying avoid us at all costs. We are still people. What would you think if you were unable to love or mourn your friends and relatives deaths. To quite robin Williams in "Bicentennial Man" "it is so cruel that you can cry and I cannot".

Unknown said...

It's obvious that you have never spent time with a psychopath.Try one out for size,and see if you will have the same opinion..Good luck

Chris Ashe said...

Their cauntious is seared.They are beyond saving !!

Anonymous said...

You obviously don't know what your talking about ! 99.999 % Really ?? Your information is 99.999 % waisted space on this post !

Chris Ashe said...

Their cauntious is seared.They are beyond saving !!

Chris Ashe said...

It's obvious that you have never spent time with a psychopath.Try one out for size,and see if you will have the same opinion..Good luck

EagleTLC said...

Late reply to this post, but am reading from this site for the first time. Just in the case that you may visit this site again....It sounds as though you are somewhat aware that you may have at least some or all of the qualities abs behaviors of a sociopath, praise God! There is help for you! His name is Jesus!!!!! Get on your knees at the foot of the cross,and repent, repent, repent and repent! So that you may be forgiven and avoid as the scripture states in Psalm 35:7-8 (read the whole Psalm when you choose, or rather quickly ) "For without cause they his their net for me; without cause they dug a pit for my life. Let destruction come upon him when he does not know it! And let the net that he his ensare him; let him fall into it to his own destruction!" Have the courage to look at you, Submit to salvation, truly submit, & I promise you that God will grow you a conscious, and cause you to have tears , real tears, & healing for whatever has caused you to have the qualities of a sociopath.it's heaven or hell friend, that's it, two choices & the choice is all yours.

Unknown said...

I am a sociopath... And I feel alot of this is true and untrue.
My story? I'll keep it short. I had a hard childhood. My mother was 15 when she had me.parents were drug addicts and had sold me off to be in the sex trade when I was merely 8 for drugs. My mother let people hurt me sexually. She put men before her childrens needs. I was homeless a lot, I was confused about my gender and the whole mental issue of "in in the wrong body". I cut myself for pleasure and belittled people for money so I didn't have to feel anxiety around people and fake my personality around so many extra people surrounding me. Not to mention people I uses, i met online never seen their faces. Terrible I know... I got easily bored of relationships with people. As soon as honey moon faze was over it would die for me. I met a man two years ago and he was a Luke warm "christian" we used one another and faught like no bodies business. But one day after our 2 year anniversary we got down to reading the bible (KJV) and he felt condemned and wanted to change his ways from there. At first I would say I was like Lot's wife. I only followed and kept to my ways. Felt like this was an advantage. Then I got reading more myself. And I felt this sadness in my heart. I knew I had to pray. So I got to my knees and begged for my eyes to be opened. I wanted to feel. I wanted to know and not guess what's wrong and right any more. I'm tired of living life a lie that I Dont even know what I'm doing any more. How am I to be a future mother if I can't even handle my own life. I'm pathetic and vile. Save me. Each day I prayed and felt more remorse and wanting to help people. I still struggle at times with numbness of feeling but at least I can sit back and think clearly with out lieing to myself to cover my mistakes. Every one is different with their testimonies. Do I slip up here and there? Yes. But who doesn't with Sin?. I beleive that i am not good and undeserving of his (gods) love and forgiveness. for I have done many wrong. I now see that I am depraved in sin as we all are in our own way. Anyone can be saved through Jesus. Gods will, will provide. To outright say people with such mental attributes cant be saved is terrible. Any one can be saved. Even the common atheist who refuses and denies all logic and who also beleives nothing matters in life. Etc. One of my favorite preachers David wood is also a sociopath. He is now a believer and teaches the gospel. God has changed his life I reccomend you listen to his testimony on YouTube. If any one reads this god bless and people can change! Even of the mental attributes. For what is god not capable of? Pray and love. For he knows all things and will save as long as you put your faith in the glorious Jesus Christ who dies for our sins. The perfect lamb. Amen.

Anonymous said...

The devil is a psychopath. He is the very definition. He comes to kill and destroy but masquerades as an angel of light. This my friend, is exactly what a psycho does. I don't know about you, but I'll leave the saving up to God and choose to live my life away from evil people.

Anonymous said...

You people understand nothing. Mark 13, has been taken totally out of context and used in a way that is not proper nor explanatory of a seared conscience and sociopathic behavior. The religious drivel on here is so very sad. You people claiming to be wise and understanding are but fools giving bad advice to people who are in terrible pain.

Anonymous said...

Sociopaths are the modern day Nephilim and I believe there's more of them around now than ever before. If you haven't done already, then I suggest you read the book of Enoch and you'll understand what i'm talking about, a little clearer. The Nephilim (half fallen angel/half human hybrids) have been around since the dawn of time. I believe Cain was the first. These nephilim were the reason God sent the flood in the days of Noah. God wanted to wipe them off the face of the earth, as they brought corruption, greed, lust and every other evil you can think of, to God's people. I believe that sociopaths have no soul and their sole aim in life is to feed on the emotions and feelings of those with souls. Everything they do is an attempt to elicit emotions in their victims and the more negative and deep these emotions are, the better for the Nephilim/sociopath. They take a sick delight in manipulating you so they can feast on your misery. If you've read the Harry Potter franchise, you'll know what I mean when I say: these are real life Dementors.

Matthew 24:37
As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man.

Anonymous said...

Continuing from the post above:

I have to say that the certainty I felt, about the above beliefs and statements has faltered somewhat since then. And I also feel a little guilty for being so judgemental.

My beliefs and statements above are essentially just guesses; guesses that make sense, but essentially still guesses. As I'm not a sociopath, I have no idea whether they have a soul and whether they feel anything at all. Their display of emotions or feelings could all be an act, but I suppose no-one can prove that its all an act, all the time. Some say sociopaths are intent on evil, but no-one can be certain whether they are intent on evil, or whether they just don't know any other way and their actions simply reflect an inability to feel remorse, shame and guilt.

Anyway there's two almost completely opposing arguments. I suppose it's up to everyone to decide for themselves which post holds the most truth. I'm not sure!

Anonymous said...

Pray for protection from these people and avoid them. Feel sympathy for them but don't engage.

If they don't appear to know what harm they are causing you, then pray to God as Jesus did on the cross. "forgive them, for they know not what they do"

If they do know what they do, and they refuse to feel remorse or to repent and correct their actions, then let God deal with them.

Anonymous said...

When you're around these people, "be as innocent as doves, and as cunning as serpents."

Never let you your guard down around them, once you know what they are. Never let them know that you know.

If you can't avoid them, then keep talking to a minimum; talk about the weather or something similarly banal. Never talk about your feelings with them (whatever those feelings may be)

Anonymous said...

Remember what Jesus said:

If they sin against you, rebuke them. If they refuse to repent, then treat them as you would "a pagan or a tax collector."

How do you treat a "pagan" or a "tax collector"?

You know that they do not love or fear God, and you expect no better treatment from them, than what you already receive from them. They know no better, or refuse to search for "better". You refuse to be influenced by them. You pray for them, and let God judge them for what they have done, on Judgement day. On that day the wheat will be separated from the tares (weeds). The sons and daughters of the devil will be uprooted and only the good crop will remain.

Matthew 5:38-39

“You have heard that it was said, ‘An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.’ But I say to you, Do not resist the one who is evil. But if anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to him the other also.

What does this mean?

It means, don't stoop to their level, keep your love as your strength, do not be tempted to follow their evil ways.


Antonio Dipino said...

So give up on them? You give up on the person? Where is the victory in Christ??? No wonder people are giving up on faith when lack of faith is shown so damned boldly in articles like this!!!