None of us are immune to turmoil within the family. In all families, you will usually notice a few peace-makers as well as a few hell-raisers. There are those who get along well with other family members and then there are those who always seem to stay in a foul mood.
In my family, as well as many others, there are those peace lovers who try to encourage everyone to "just get along" and there are those who on the flip side seem to thrive on strife and nitpicking. There are those who prefer to follow and those who prefer to be led. Among the long list of reasons for family disunity, there are envy and greed, mental illness, overall dysfunction, and drug addiction. These are only a few possible causes of chaos within the family.
Mental Illness and Emotional Upheaval
Many families suffer due to the emotional or mental problems of the members within it.
It is a sad thing to watch a family member with mental and emotional problems refuse much needed treatment and support from professionals. Much turmoil could be blotted out in a majority of families today if those with mental illness would only seek help. But many who fit this description don't accept or understand the fact that they need help. It is usually always seen by them to be the other family member's problems that keep the pot of strife stirred up within the family. When you find yourself in a situation such as this, you must tread lightly and carry a short stick. You must watch what you say and be on your guard if you have a mentally challenged person in your family.
Those with mood disorders such as depression and the like seem to be fine one day and riled up the next. I have found that if these people decide to forego help by trained professionals, there is little you can do. You must take nothing they say to heart no matter how their moods seem to flip flop. Understand that the problem they are having is all about them and not you! Don't wear your emotions on your sleeve or you will have constant heartache and trouble.
Drug Addiction in the family
With drug addiction comes a boatload of turmoil for any family. When one is addicted to drugs, they neglect their family members and treat them badly. This is because the drug means more to them than even those in the family they are the closest to. Those who have drug addicted family members will be affected in more ways than one. There is the constant dread of finding out that something horrible has happened to them. There is the constant push from them to have you, their family member take care of them by giving them money, shelter, etc. As well as the emotional turmoil you must endure for as long as they use.
Jealousy among family members
Those family members with a jealous or envious streak can wreak havoc upon other family members. They feel they've been given the lowest card in the deck for one reason or another. Who do they blame? Who knows, perhaps their parents, siblings or maybe even God. All they know is they've been given a raw deal in their eyes and because of this, their jealousy/envy has driven them to even hate other family members.
Those who feel they've been treated unfairly can dish out much misery upon other family members. If you've come up against the brick wall of jealousy, the best you can do is to practice avoidance and prayer. Pray that those who are caught up in jealousy would realize the emotions they let control them are not only counter productive for their family, but deadly. Pray that they would want free of them.
Some dysfunctional family members may attempt to play a twisted game of "divide and conquer" when it comes to dealing with family members. They will pit one member against another. Very unusual to do within one's family whom you are suppose to love and protect from forces outside the family unit. Those who do these things are generally acting out of an intense lack of self esteem and may suffer from personality or mental disorders.
Harmony in ones family is getting harder to come by. It is definitely in short supply. Do you sit down to an evening meal with your family from time to time? Chances are you don't. With more people within the family working and having more demanding schedules than ever before, this is almost a thing of the past.
What is the driving force behind love for our family? Where is our motivation to care for and love them equally and completely? Love of God. Loving him who first loved us is definitely a must. The growing chill in the hearts of many will only get worse as time goes on and does not exclude families.
In your family, be kind to others. Help them when possible, pray for them often. Estranged family members need prayer also. Whether they have treated you well or poorly. We should pray for them as God has instructed us to. Remember, whichever type of turmoil your family is going through, keep the faith. Keep your chin up and lean on God and don't rely upon your own understanding. This alone will bring you more peace than you ever thought possible in the midst of family turmoil.